I feel like I'm a terrible tortoise parent (only partly true; there are many things I should have done differently from day one. Some I knew about, some I did not), and that I don't deserve to have pets of any kind.

I feel like my family doesn't support me in my passion (and kinda never has. Reading about animals is well and good, but owning them has always been a point of conflict).

Oddly enough, I feel lonely.
Matt is on a business trip, and I'm grieving the death of a beloved friend.
I'm not lonely in the "I want to socialize" way (that would take more energy than I have)... just in the "I want to velcro myself to your shoulder and have you tell me everything is okay while I drench your shirt in snot and tears" way. I want to see a close friend or family member... even just so I have an excuse to stop *feeling* and pretend to be okay.

I was gonna cry myself to sleep, again, but the cats can feel that I'm upset, and are attempting to deal with this in their own ways. Waldo has been scritching and petting me, Boots... has been howling.

Very helpful.